Achievement/Success

Have you been seeing all of these commercials preparing us for the winter Olympics? They are so heartfelt, tear-jerking and so honoring to mothers. Many of the athletes explain how they wouldn’t be where they are today without the support of their mom.  I had an interesting thought while watching some of these.  Yes, they are honoring and they are giving respect where it’s due, but I see the other side, too — those parents that feel like they have failed because their children haven’t had great achievement or success.

Think of the dedication, practice, … and failures that it takes to be an Olympian. We don’t really hear much about all the times they failed or didn’t make it. Usually, it’s all the good things that got them to where they are now.  At times I feel like some parents get a gold metal and have it all figured out, but really they had failures along the way.

Can you be OK even if your child doesn’t have achievements and success or can you be OK even if your child’s behavior is not exemplary? Think of those times when your child has a temper tantrum in the aisle of the local store. People don’t just look at the child. They look at the parent and expect you to fix it, because somehow we are supposed to make our children be perfect at all times.

My kid is not my report card.

For me, it’s very easy to parent out of fear to try and get a better result or to fix something. We put so much pressure on not only our children but ourselves. It’s very easy in the monotony of life — doing laundry, dishes, changing diapers, and preparing meals — to feel like you have little personal achievement or success.  Recently, a therapist spoke at my MOPS group and something he said stuck with me: “Our culture doesn’t esteem motherhood.” The simple truth, but so hard to grasp, is that those simple mundane things matter and are meaningful achievements and success.

So many of us won’t have Olympians, but it’s OK. I repeat, it’s OK! Let’s find achievement and success in the small, everyday things.